Part memoir, part tall tale, part instructional manual: Chris DeBrie’s “Check Your Tandems” is from the perspective of a truck driver as he moves from newbie “greenhorn” to seasoned professional.

What is “slip seat trucking”? It is for the tractor trailer driver who does not own a truck. This variety of driver is known as a “company driver.” He must get to work every day and choose one of a number of rented or company-owned trucks for the day. Slip seat trucking means that the company driver never quite knows what he’s getting into, in all senses of that phrase.

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In other words, slip seating really stinks, in general. Unless you are one of those guys who just doesn’t give a flip.

A job that pays consistently is nothing to scoff at, no matter what year it is. That being said, even the best jobs have issues. Even superstar celebrities would change a few things about their gigs.

Driving a big truck for a living has its challenges. One thing that compounds those issues is being a slip seat trucker. The company keeps costs down by having rotating drivers and trucks, for sure.

The monkey grunt driver who shows up every day must sometimes accept that he is not going to get what he wants. Anyone who ever drove a truck already knows about the frustrations of slip seating…

• dirty surfaces and trash left in the truck cabs
• driving after a heavy smoker who left smoke stink and fluttering ashes
• finding a truck that has little or no fuel in the tanks
• radios, wipers and air conditioners/heaters that are left at full blast
• trucks that shift and operate differently from day to day because of bad drivers
• accidentally leaving some personal item and having it stolen before you get back to the terminal

…You get the point. One slip seat company I drove for had daily sign out sheets. They felt forced to do these sheets, because some drivers were too lazy and-or sorry to do things like bus their own trash and fuel up trucks before turning in the keys for the next guy.

The sheets contained questions such as:

“Did you fuel up? If not why not? Did you get into a clean truck? Any damage to truck?” and so on…

Turned out that the sign-out sheets were a total scare tactic; a farce. Because the bosses didn’t do anything, no matter what drivers did. They were just happy if we showed up when obligated, and made the runs without wrecking anything. The sheets were there to intimidate people with a conscience.

We could draw an analogy to the hype over gun registration and control — the criminals aren’t going to worry about nerd stuff like government paperwork either way. They are going to get theirs.

Slip seating is not great unless you are on dedicated runs, during which you at least have a few days with the same rig. Or, maybe where you share a truck with only one or two others. Seems these are rare situations while slip seating. Ten pairs of hands might touch a rig before it gets back to you. 

My philosophy was and is: Take care of things for the next guy because the next guy could be you.

My advice to the young trucker: Stay away from slip seating, if you can possibly help it. Most likely, you won’t be able to avoid it at some point in your driving career.

Keep a “go bag” with cleaning supplies like disinfectant spray, air freshener, small towels, and wet wipes. That steering wheel and shifter should be wiped down immediately upon entering the cab! Don’t slack on this! If you need a reason, you’ll get one the first time you play maid, and take a look at the wipes… The go bag might also include ink pens, small knife, hammer, tire gauge, load strap, and a few plastic shopping bags so YOU can keep the truck clean. Yes, the go bag might be a bit hefty depending on you, but it is worth it.

Check the truck every day, even though “it’s not mine; it’s company.” Even when you were the last one to drive it. You don’t know what happened in the hours since you last saw the truck. Someone might have driven it 20 miles, realized something was wrong, and brought it back. Air line pulled loose or anything. Most drivers, most people, don’t care when using something that is not theirs. It might be natural attitude but the true professional driver is different than that. Lives are at stake.

Don’t forget to check your tandems while you’re out there!