We knew Dennis Rodman was twisted and perverted, but this is ridiculous.

The Philadelphia Sixers came to Roanoke to play the Railguns. Their lineup looks a bit sick, and not in the way the world means ‘sick’… we mean, ill, and not very good at all. Sloppy game on both sides.

They were terrible and we were busy being terrible at imitating the Harlem Globetrotters. So, lots of turnovers… still… Roanoke-Philly, 69-43.

part 1

part 2

part 3

part 4

The simulator gave us a loss [Sacramento Kings], then a win [Washington Wizards]. The simulator is 3-2 on our behalf so far. When we take the controls, the Railguns are 8-2.


A long-term injury to Panthro Wang and mild injury to Quinn Nevalove gave the team a different look. To keep player from being hurt, the gamer must play every single game by hand. Not going to happen. Goal was to play the hand the CPU dealt.

Starting lineup: Dumars, Stevens, Havlicek, Rodman, and Heaton. [new starters in italics]

So… Roanoke Railguns 11-4 (3-2 SIM)….


Time for the Cleveland Cavaliers. And time for a beating, personally… Roanoke only lost by one, 75-74, but it was uphill all the way. Little bit overconfident even with our injuries? Maybe.


Really missing Panthro’s sure shots. We’ll see what happens when we meet again at full strength. Hmmm, we sound like the Cavs fans in the 2015 real life Finals.

John Havlicek is our leading scorer at about 13.5 point per game. 

SIM had the Railguns lose at home to the Milwaukee Bucks. Panthro is healed just in time for the start of December 2015, and to host the Golden State Warriors. Already?


Steph Curry was out for the game, injured. Someone named Barbarosa was starting at point guard. So we made sure to win the game, 84-62. Barbarosa got his pocket picked maybe 15 times by even Heaton, the seven-footer with the hands of a guard. Now Golden State can say they weren’t at full strength.


After the win over the Warriors, Roanoke was 12-6 (3-3 in

simulated games).


The Bulls were up again. They were better than Roanoke in early December. But Panthro Wang obviously disliked dealing with his doppelganger in Chicago. The Railgun version went for 24 points. The franchise record (29) was set by John Derry Stevens in the Cleveland loss. Final score: 70-67.

Ouch…

The Detroit Pistons came to town with a similar win-loss record. Poor guys… The Railguns stripped the ball away about 20 times… 

 

Starting to realize that something is off…

Tommy Heaton the seven-footer was probably the team MVP at that point. We just used him as a free-roaming thief, trying to rip the basketball whenever possible. This time he finished with 6 steals, along with 6 boards and 10 points in a 24-minute game. What would it be like if you were a six-foot point guard, and a nimble giant came along swatting at your dribble? Probably scary. Final score: 90-63.

vanilla back court swarms and serves

 

 

The Roanoke Railguns were first in the East (14-6), just ahead of the Cavs (14-7). The Thunder led in the West (15-6) by 1.5 games over San Antonio. 

Miami’s Heat arrived in Railgun Arena. The Heat were Roanoke’s season opener, and Chris Bosh was the main spanker. We were the spankee. But that was a learning experience and we were confident this time around. Never know how the computer will ‘tweak’ things, though.


The Railguns’ only human-controlled losses were to the Heat and Hawks to begin the season… then to Cleveland a calendar month later. At the last moment Coach decided to simulate this Heat game: 79-56, ARG. 

Vikayanov splashes from 26-28 feet

Just wanted a new team to see, and that means Memphis was hosting the team… couldn’t do the usual stripping of the ball, maybe the Grizzlies’ players have good handles. But the game was still a ferocious loss for them, 82-53…

 

Some of these guys do amazing animated moves, but we mostly just move the ball around at speed, which can be a problem when a player throws a pass into the crowded paint instead of the intended perimeter man. Normally the result is an open jumper.

After that, Boston goes down, losing by 42. We could have turned up the difficulty from Pro, but why? Roanoke had a 29-9 lead after the first quarter. Even Tyler Hansbrough had him some highlights… the Railguns were then 17-6 (3-3 SIM)