There is a buzz about Baylor University hoops superstar Brittney Griner playing in the NBA. A few souls watched her dominate other women in college, and have concluded that she is transcendent enough to play with the best basketball players on the planet.
All us gym rats and weekend sports warriors have encountered the occasional woman who can (and even wants to) hang with the fellas in a game of hoops, but Griner in the pros? In the words of a friend, “You’re stretchin’ it there, buddy.”
Dallas Maverick owner Mark Cuban tweeted that he might consider taking her in the 2013 NBA Draft. If he is not joking, I agree with UConn women’s coach Geno Auriemma, who said Cuban’s credibility would take a hit from such a move.
Auriemma is being very tactful. To be blunt, this idea belongs in the same trash heap as the idea that a terrific college basketball or football team could beat a bad pro team.Â
Every few years, people see a great university squad and start speculating on this. The UNLV Runnin’ Rebels of the early 1990s were one team that fit into such a conversation. Who knows? The Rebs might have beaten the worst team in the pros in a one-shot, what-just-happened scenario.
Â
But realistically, the pros are more conditioned and stronger; they play almost three times as many games per season. Also, they are more likely to see games as a business, a job, while college-age young men are notorious for emotional ups and downs. These factors would make a huge difference. A college team beating a pro team almost certainly wouldn’t happen in a game the pros took seriously, and even less likely is a successful Griner NBA career. It doesn’t matter how many other females she lays next to in a bed. It doesn’t matter how deep her voice is.
Yes, Griner is very tall and athletic and can dunk from a standstill. But that’s not enough. There are thousands of tall and athletic men who would be humiliated on a professional basketball court. No one is grabbing six-foot-six guys off of your local gym court, or off of the sidewalk during lunch hour. Why? Because they don’t belong in the “L” either. And we aren’t even talking about the other thousands of men who played major college ball, who are very good athletes, and who didn’t quite make it.
Even seriously discussing this feels silly. One host of a show called SportsNation, which is yet another sports opinion show (the gimmick: they also displays viewer polls in real time), was doggedly trying to get Griner into the NBA door. “Couldn’t she at least play in the summer league… and we’ll see what’s what? Oh you know you guys out there would watch it! She could school YOU, buddy! Sister, you deserve a chance!”
Are we so politically correct that we can’t just admit this idea is ridiculous? Is it misogynist to say so? I’m saying it anyway. Call it what you want.
First justification people give: Griner can beat the men (like me) who rightly mock this kind of talk. Griner plays
ball for a living; of course she would make the average 9-to-5 dude (like me) look silly. I’d make her look inept at jobs and talents I’ve worked and practiced… so, what?
Second: Is the fact that “people would watch” a good reason? People watch garbage shows like Toddlers and Tiaras, Love & Hip Hop, and Buckwild, too. People watch fistfights, dogfights, and the aftermath of auto accidents. These are two stubbornly dumb reasons to set out for consumption.
If the NBA players were able to set aside the whole circus atmosphere of such a scenario, and were seriously competing (i.e., playing for their paychecks and jobs), Griner would certainly be humiliated and outclassed. (I can just imagine the clown grins and browbeating that media would give the pros before such a game. “Don’t play too rough with your little sister! Let her score!”)
But she would be beaten and she would probably weep before a camera. People who think otherwise are either kidding themselves, or haven’t really watched a lot of basketball across all levels. Basketball is not a bunch of guys gliding around in gentle ways, taking open jump shots. It is a contact sport.
Yet talking heads and feminists are obnoxious in insisting she should have a chance to run with the big dogs. These people not only want content to get people watching, listening, and commenting. They are determined to gender-bend, gender-blend, everything in this world. They have agendas that fit their confused outlook on life. “Obnoxious” might be too kind a description–you might even use the term “sick in the head.”
Just watch the top women teams in the NCAA play–the top teams, now. Check out how starters for ranked colleges routinely do “oh, wow, I’m in the heat of battle, watch me get frazzled to pieces” things that you see in any Saturday morning fifth-grade city league game. It is why you see multiple forty-point blowouts in the women’s regular season and tournament every year.
For every Skylar Diggins or Elena Delle Donne, there are a hundred relatively uncoordinated young ladies who appear to have made the team by default. That’s the issue with women’s basketball–there are not enough players on the top tier. Maybe never will be.
After a few minutes of looking at the best NCAA women, watch any average men’s game. It’s not just about jumping higher and dunking. Overall, the guys are running faster, getting started running more quickly, and decision-making more efficiently. It’s not debatable. Even their passes are almost always sharper, stronger, more accurate.
Griner may be better than all of those other women. One can imagine the crowd roaring as she hits the occasional open jumper or backdoor dunk, versus men ten years her senior and three times as strong. But she is 6-8 with relatively sluggish feet, and weighs anywhere from fifty to one hundred pounds less than men of comparable position in the pros. Added to the stronger, quicker, faster attributes, there is simply little chance for her to succeed. It becomes a fun topic for about ten minutes. Yet the stubbornly dumb will call it a success if she scores a couple baskets.
These observations are not putting females down; they’re not insults. They are facts. Why can’t we just enjoy the women’s game for what it is? Why do we have to bait arguments and fit square pegs into round holes? Are we really talking about this? Oh, you don’t think a woman could…? Do I think Griner could guard LeBron James (or any competent NBA forward)? Nope.
And the answer, “Well, no one can guard him” is a terrible rebuttal. With that logic, I want to fight Manny Pacquiao and collect that massive check. After all, pretty much no one in the world can beat Pacquiao in a boxing match, right? And I think I can land a few punches. So I deserve that opportunity.
Jackie McMullan, long-time Boston journalist, said on an April 2013 episode of ESPN’s Around the Horn that Griner wouldn’t make it in the pros. “But it doesn’t matter,” McMullan said perceptively. It should be enough that Griner is a historical great in the women’s game, and that she will be a standout in the WNBA and Olympics. Leave it at that.